Love, Relationships & You

Activate Your Inner Heart Intelligence

Increase Intimacy Communicate Better Open Your Heart Meet Yourself Fully Heal Past Trauma Rebuild Trust Feel Fully Met Feel More Alive Experience Community



A Weekend Workshop for Transforming Yourself, Your Relationships and the World.

Attend 'Love, Relationships & You' in a City Near You

"Practical skills to live more joyful lives - this event is heart-centered, heart-led and heart-opening. You will laugh. You will cry.

But most of all you will deepen in an experience of what it is to truly feel loved and to love others authentically from your innermost heart."


Priya Mahtani

Heart iQ Coach, Graduated in 2014

What Is Heart iQ? And why does it matter?


Dear Friend, Welcome! ‍

If this is your first time here, then you're probably wondering, "WHAT IS HEART IQ? AND WHAT IS THIS EVENT ABOUT?" and "WHY DO I NEED IT?"

Well, to better answer these important questions, I've created some short videos on the topics that really matter to you.  

Just follow the prompts in the video below and let me show you the wonderful world of Heart iQ...


Christian Pankhurst
Founder of Heart iQ & Author of Insights to Intimacy

The Problem


The language of Heart iQ is the result of over twenty years of study and research in the fields of heart centered communication, authentic relating and embodiment.

Through direct observation of thousands of group interactions during my deep dive relationship and awakening retreats, I began to see patterns of communication and conflict, and learned how to translate these dynamics into a new language of the heart that everyone can learn.

Language has evolved over thousands of years, becoming more advanced over time. The introduction of verbal communication using basic hand signals and grunts was a huge leap forward in our evolution as it allowed us to convey complex ideas. It led to massive innovation, collaboration and change on a worldwide scale.

Despite the move toward a more technologically connected world, it is clear that we are divided on many deeper levels. Nations are at war, communities are in conflict, families are breaking apart, couples are divorcing and individuals are suffering with loneliness and a sense of separation that is being numbed by distractions of modern life – contributing to an increase in mental health issues.

The Solution


Today’s method of communicating, as advanced as it is, is built to connect the mind instead of our hearts, but it is no longer enough.

We need a new way of communication through connection – a way that connects us to the long-ignored sacred and divine aspects of our true nature and that of others.

Heart iQ is my contribution to the emerging culture of connection where communication occurs on multiple levels simultaneously.  We all know that communication is multifaceted – our words, body, energy, emotions, and spirit all convey our message.
Until now though, there has never been a system to harness all of these aspects TOGETHER.

When we communicate in a way where the aim is not to say the ‘right thing’, but the ‘real thing’, we end up communicating our authentic essence and heart – integrating our higher realms of consciousness with the perfectly imperfect wounded parts of our humanity.

Heart iQ is highly intuitive. It's a language you already know deep down, but to which you have lost access. You were born with it, but it's been conditioned out of you by our mentally driven culture.

The Invitation

During "Love, Relationships & You", you will be guided by Christian, step-by-step, day-by-day to increase your Heart iQ.

Deep personal happiness, healthy intimate relationships and resonant communities are created when these tools are learned, practiced and used in daily life.

If you feel called to study a deeper, richer, more heart-based approach to authentic connection and intimacy in relationships, then look no further – this workshop will help you get there.

Attend 'Love, Relationships & You' in a City Near You
What You'll Learn 

Live Event

During Love, Relationships & You, you will be guided through personal, relational and circle practices. See below for a summary of what you'll learn in each of these areas.

Self Connection Practices

Track Your Inner World

Being able to consistently access joy in your daily life can be challenging. We've devised a system of processing your moment-to-moment reality called Heart iQ Tracking.

Heart iQ Tracking provides valuable insight into what’s causing resistance to joy, what’s getting in the way, and which thoughts and judgments are keeping you from loving what is alive in you in every moment.

Increase Capacity

Capacity is the amount of open 'bandwidth' you have available to stay connected to your Heart before you become triggered into collapse, fight, or flight.

If you are operating at low capacity, you will not have the emotional and mental strength to meet your pain and the pain of others in a beneficial and non-toxic way.

During the event, you will receive several practices to increase your natural state of capacity.

Amplify Presence

Presence is more than the act of being attentive. In Heart iQ we define Presence as the integrated practice of being in connection to your breath, feeling grounded, energetically 'holding' while being tethered to source and meeting the moment with an open, responsive Heart.

During the event you will be guided through practices to increase your embodied presence which will serve every Heart you touch.

Raise Consciousness

A big part of Heart iQ is to become aware of the multiple layers that make up 'you'. You will learn how to become conscious of your defence mechanisms, your shadows and your blind spots as well as how you suppress your pain and express yourself in unhealthy and toxic ways. ‍

Raising your consciousness in these areas is key to changing old habits and establishing new healthy behaviours.

Become Embodied

Heart iQ is an embodied way of connection and communication with oneself and other. To become more embodied, you’ll embrace bringing your awareness into the body, deepening your connection to movement, breath, sound & touch.

During the event you’ll have the opportunity to deepen your embodiment, and as a result, activate your life force while staying grounded and connected to your intrinsic goodness & authentic essence.

Detoxify the BodyMind

Most people are aware of nutritional cleanses where one detoxes the body from the accumulated gunk created from unhealthy eating habits.‍

However, we also need to cleanse our emotional and energetic bodies from the toxic buildup of repressed pain created by making choices that distract us from our feelings and expressing our full light.

During the event, you will enter into a gentle detox of your emotional and energetic body bringing awareness, compassion and lightness to your being.

Manage Energy, Trigger & Trauma

We are all source connected expressions of love and light. Yet we also carry wounding and trauma, that can often go “underground,” sabotaging our personal happiness and relationships.

During the event, you will learn how to hold all of your parts in love and navigate triggers more effectively.

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Relationship & Intimacy Practices

Share Triggers Effectively

Most of us have felt triggered in connection with others, especially those we love. Learning how to track these triggers and unpack the 'zip file' so we may own our projections and stay in healthy connection is a cornerstone of Heart iQ.

During the event, you will practice sharing your inner world without blame or collapse, while staying in your truth. Building this capacity will allow you to feel others and be felt, to be in connection rather than conflict, in what historically may have felt stressful and overwhelming.

Own Your Stuff

Knowing how to listen, acknowledge, praise, reassure, confirm another's reality, while moving your emotion in a non-toxic way is critical.

You'll learn how to consciously express and own your stuff which will create more connection rather than closure and shut down.

Release Toxic Relationship Dynamics

When we're not conscious of how we use our pain to hurt, manipulate, castrate or punish, we are in a state of weaponised closure, where our closed heart is now wanting to act out rather than open to the heart break and be with it consciously.

You're going to learn how to track your pain, your shadows and defence strategies while learning how to communicate them lovingly with compassion and grace.

Resolve Conflicts Artfully

It is expected that as we journey together and open our hearts, disappointment, hurt and boundary violations will come up. However, how we communicate and repair in those moments is not only critical, it's an art form. ‍

During the event, you'll have the opportunity to practice and experience how intimacy can actually deepen through sharing your withholds.

"Dare to Share"

It's easy to share non-triggering stuff when everyone is in a good place. But how to share when there’s a risk of causing pain, heartbreak or anger?

During the event, you'll be invited to practice sharing in a way that will avoid the common pitfalls of this level of communication, allowing you to be free to live your truth.

Agreements for a Safe Container

Making relationship and connection agreements is one of the most vital things you can do to foster both your personal awakening, as well as create depth, intimacy and juiciness in your relationships.‍

Much of the pain that’s transferred between you and another is due to personal and relationship boundaries not being defined and needs not being spoken.

Attend 'Love, Relationships & You' in a City Near You

Heart iQ Circle Practices

The Laws of Energetic Group Dynamics

When gathering together in groups larger than 8, group dynamics begin to emerge. Learning to understand these dynamics will help you translate what is happening without taking on the energies in the amplified field.

Being in circle can be very rich and gratifying, but if you don't understand what is happening in the field, it can leave you confused, disconnected and re-traumatised.

The Heart iQ Circle Protocol

During the event, you will be trained in a basic structure around how to be in circle, how to open up the space and guide shares, as well as how to share impact and 'medicine' and close the circle properly.

Learning to facilitate basic structure is a key element in Heart iQ as circles derail very quickly without leadership. Leadership in a circle is provided by different members in the group who have clarity on what’s moving in the moment.

Heart iQ Generational Healing Circle

Some of our pain can't be cleared on our own or in relationship because it is collective in nature – passed on from others that came before us.

We call this ‘generational pain’ and the best way to clear it is through circle.

Group Agreements

Having clear agreements is critical for successful communities and circles to flourish. Agreements create a container for everyone to rest in, and it establishes safety and protocols for certain dynamics if and when they occur. ‍

The more we speak the unspoken, the more resonant a field becomes. Therefore, the clearer you make the agreements up front, the higher the quality of circle you will have.

Tribal Regulation

One of the most powerful parts of the work is to support the relaxation of your nervous system though what we call 'Tribal Regulation'. This is where the group or 'tribe' offer their loving presence and touch to help your nervous system 'drop' and relax into a state of restoration, openness and connection.

Many of us have experienced self regulation or co-regulation with another, but the experience of tribal regulation is something very special and feels like coming home.

Clearing Conflict in Circle

An important part of community living is to clear conflicts quickly and directly in order to keep the field and the community emotionally hygienic.

However, learning to clear withholds and judgments without getting into deeper conflict and disconnection requires a lot of skill and practice, a journey you will begin here in the 90-day Challenge.

Giving & Receiving Feedback

Feedback is the key to growth. We cannot see ourselves fully without a mirror. Learning to give high quality feedback requires wielding a sharp and accurate sword since there’s no use in looking into a distorted mirror. Similarly, receiving feedback requires openness to change and humility to accept what might feel like bitter pills to swallow.

Attend 'Love, Relationships & You' in a City Near You

Select Your Retreat

Prices on a Sliding Scale: Pay according to your capacity. 

As a gesture towards economic equity we’re introducing a sliding scale for our retreat fees. In previous years we have seen that fixed prices hindered access for many who might benefit from the experience and the transformation we can offer. A sliding scale allows us to serve people from a wider range of economic groups while maintaining retreat fees as a reliable pillar of our economy.

NOVEMBER 23 - 26


Pilateslab-Berlin, Choriner Straße 31, 10435 Berlin
Thursday: 6.30pm - 10pm
Friday: 9pm - 10pm
Saturday: 9am - 10pm
Sunday: 9am - 5pm
Prices EXCLUDE meals, travel and accommodation.


Our Quality Guarantee and Refund Policy 

We want you to be in your joy when registering for this event, so we've decided to remove all of the risk!

If after completing the event (all sessions), you feel we did not deliver the value expected, just let one of our event staff know at the end of the event (but before you leave) and we'll arrange an immediate refund.

What Others Say

Hear directly from other Heart iQ Graduates


“As guys, we don’t know how to access our emotions, but the work of Heart iQ has made it safe for me to go there.”

United Kingdom

“I had become blocked in my feelings for my wife and children. With Heart iQ, I started having more space inside me to feel how much love I have for all of them. I’ve learned that I have to keep my inner space clear so that I can feel what’s important to me. It’s the space inside me that allows me to let them in more deeply.”

Simon M
United Kingdom

"These days, I have shared things with my husband that I haven’t shared in seventeen years, and it feels so great and relieving—and he is still here! To have all these tools and to experience that people can go through things and feel more joy, all this is encouraging me to know that I can do this more in my life."


I had become blocked in my feelings for my wife and children. With Heart iQ, I started having more space inside me to feel how much love I have for all of them. I’ve learned that I have to keep my inner space clear so that I can feel what’s important to me. It’s the space inside me that allows me to let them in more deeply.

United Kingdom

“I can now feel what I want and then ask for what I want. This had made a huge difference for me to feel safe and secure in my relationship.”

United Kingdom

“I can’t really remember feeling so joyful before; I’m wide open! I feel like I’ve been present to a coming together in such a beautiful way through this work.”

Simon G.
United Kingdom

“These days, I have shared things with my husband that I haven’t shared in seventeen years, and it feels so great and relieving—and he is still here! To have all these tools and to experience that people can go through things and feel more joy, all this is encouraging me to know that I can do this more in my life.”


“I’m taking away an acceptance that it’s okay and safe to embrace all of me. In fact, I relish it now because that’s when my heart smiles!”

United States

“Through this work, I know that it’s safe to speak my truth in the moment and that I can rely on my own safety within.”


“I feel joyful, light, still, and allowed to drop deep in my feminine power and vulnerability. I thank you for having such a clear program, and in such a short time, getting to the core.”


“Sometimes, I end up getting stuck on what I want, and I can’t see the whole picture. Through this work, I’ve realized I have such a great relationship with my partner. We have a wonderful life together!”


“There have been so many ‘Oh My God!’ life-changing moments; it’s fantastic!”

United Kingdom

“This is one of the best personal development experiences I’ve had in my eighteen years of working on myself. You incorporate the whole experience—body, mind, and spirit. It was so rich!”


“The most important thing I take away is to be able to track my own thoughts and feelings and not to immediately judge them or diagnose myself after ten seconds. I don’t have to follow old patterns, and it feels really good! It’s been a confirmation that all the things we’ve done to this point have brought us here, and I know I’m on the way now.”


“I realize that it can be joyful to work on my shit!”


“I’m taking away a clear and constant heart. I’m taking away tools that can make my really good relationship great!”

United Kingdom

“I feel really open—I feel like I have love for the whole world. I never thought it would be possible in such a short time to get insights that I’ve been trying to find for so long. I’ve been trying to let go of an old relationship that was so painful for me, and I could finally release it through this work.”

Meet Christian

About Your Facilitator

Christian Pankhurst is a world leading expert in group dynamics, conscious communication, and the art of circle facilitation. Christian is a master conductor of the collective wisdom that emerges when resonant hearts come together, and his piercing clarity lovingly cuts through bullshit while he holds a space of unconditional love for what wants to emerge in the now.

Christian teaches how to tap into the power of the collective wisdom or 'field' so facilitators learn how to heal themselves and others simultaneously through a process that is embodied and joyful rather than heady and focused on solving problems. 

Christian's unique capacity to translate  complex group dynamics into simple, clear and practical insights is the reason why so many seek him out to get trained in the art of small and large group facilitation.

Christian started facilitating groups in 2002 after graduating as a Chiropractor from the AECC in the U.K. His speciality is using a group’s wisdom and energy to open up gateways of transformation that are simply not available in an individual or one-on-one practice. 

In 2008, Christian entered and won the Britain's Next Top Coach Competition, receiving 52% of the votes from over 90 countries around the world. He is the best-selling author of Insights To Intimacy - Why Relationships Fail and How To Make Them Work, and is the co-founder of New Eden, a centre for those wishing to grow, co-create and awaken together in community.

Frequently Asked Questions

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